*splat*
As fast as the Japanese Bullet Train,
annoyance overcomes me.
Plastered on my face. Ticked.
Plastered on my heart. Hurt.
Plastered in my voice. Rude.
Plastered in my mind. Hate.
Calm down, Smile!
Ignorance is bliss.

one more day at work here... ah. then on to more sleep and laundromat... hahaha... man, i have an interview at a Japanese bank tomorrow, hopefully, i will do okay and get that job... i need a real job, not just temping around being receptionists for people. today is gonna be a busy day... lots of meetings and such. probably won't be able to go on AIM as much today... sigh... i am an AIM-aholic. the sad thing is... i have this lil "Bible Club" set up where we keep each other accountable for doing QT's everyday... and if we miss one day, then we would get punished -- no AIM for 5 days! yeah, it's so sad... i'm doing my QT's just so that I won't have to miss going on AIM. This is bad. but i guess it's a start for me since I'm soooo lazy... at least i will read the Bible and perhaps finish the whole OT some day... but at the pace i'm going... maybe it'll take another 2 years to finish just the OT. (oh, the monster just walked in... storming down the hall as usual... as if she's important and has something to do...)

hmmph. last nite... my sisters and i got into a nasty argument with my cousin. It was all over something very stupid and very insignificant... although i wasn't too sure what happened cuz i was in the showers when it started... (i feel so bloated right now... i eat too much) i think it was about reading the Bible. Alice was probably complaining about reading it cuz she's in my Bible Club... haha. or perhaps it was too noisy or something, and so she started arguing with Je-Ying... and as if that wasn't enough... Kuan had to sing some sarcastic tune about their bickering or something... or about how Alice shouldn't even bother to read the Bible if she has that attitude. Knowing my sisters, they have major pride issues... they weren't gonna take his joke even if he meant it as a "joke." They thought it was rather condescending... and of course, i had to add oil to the fire... what better way to blow thiings up right? I defended my sisters like any other sibling would do... It was true, Kuan never means it in a bad way... He had every intent of sharing his wisdom of the Bible to them... but they would never listen. Everything he tells them, they thought of as condescending, which, more often than not, was true. Pride is a hard and heavy wall to bulldoze down. My sisters would automatically put up a shield and defend their pride. I know them all too well to know that they weren't going to listen to each other, no matter what the argument was. After all these years of college, I have pride myself in knowing how to deal with others in different situations... and my cousin is still too young to know that criticism doesn't go well with most people, even if it's the truth. Perhaps I am judging him and putting him down as well by saying that he needs the college experience in order to grow and mature, and perhaps to think before he speak or act, because the human heart is weak, and shatters at a pindrop. I have heard from many that I've matured a lot, but have I really? If i have, why am i not setting good examples for my sisters? Kuan had made the mistake of saying that there's no spirituality in our family. ouch. But what he meant to say was... we weren't edifying at all. we weren't edifying to each other, rather, destructive.

I asked Je-Ying to describe me in one word... and she said... self-indulgent. I was rather upset, but perhaps it is the truth that I'm upset over. I think too much of myself and how I feel in situations... I'm not edifying to my sisters... how are they to be edifying to each other or my cousin? At home, I don't live a christian life, I am not patient with my family at all. I take them for granted. Is the real you when you're at home? or when you're out in the world? Home brings out the worst in each person... or perhaps it's just me. Jeying is probably one person that acts the same at home or not, she has a temper sometimes, but that's only cuz she's sensitive.... but she's really actually very mild tempered and patient. haha, that's why i take advantage of her all the time, cuz i can. what is the lesson here? I need to act more Christ-like, I need to be edifying, and I need to set a good example for my sisters (because I truly have a lot of weight to how the behave and act).

So I'm at work right now... and what else can I blog about? hahaha... people at work... my my... there's this really bitchy person here... excuse the french, but that's the only word to describe her... she walks around with heels... and so you can hear her stomping down the hall... and she's small... but has a huge ass... and is rude. she yelled at me on my first day, but people here told me to ignore her... cuz that's just the way she is... and today... i hear fast footsteps... i see Trina. I look at her, try to smile, she looks back.. didn't smile... and just walked past me.... stormed into a room... and started yelling at these IT guys... damn... she was soooo mean... "can you please try to work with me here, i've heard this several times already, please don't send him to do something he doesn't know how. I'm going to get in trouble for all of this. blah blah blah..." man, she's scary.

yes, it's so hard keeping up with blogs when i have so many readeres... hahaha. sigh... what a life... i have nothing to blog about, yet i'm blogging. and i can blab on forever. Who am I? If i can describe myself in one word.... what will that word be? Ruth said "twisted." yes, i kinda agree... but i think i'm more neurotic. hahaha. yes, to a certain degree, and to others... aloof. but i'm probably not as cold as i appear. probably. or am i. i don't think i am... i think i'm a passionate person... just don't want to show it... hehe. I show what i want to show. and so... maybe i'm fake? I know ruth will be reading this. So, I would like to say... Ruthie is a psychotic and ditsy person, she is the one that made me ditsy cuz i hang out with her too much... hahahaha.....

So I haven't blogged in like... what... a day? Feel like I'm out of touch already... I went away for one night... and already, I am changing the blogging world... hahaa... Ruthie got her own blog~! yes! next is Lisa. hooray.

By the way, I would like to thank Jon for revamping this page. It looks great. A lil on the FOB side. but i guess that's what people think i am right? yes, i always get offended, but what can i say? some people are naive, and some people think they're cooler cuz they're ABC's. whatever.

oooh lah lah... i wake up, go to work, and i see 2 new guestbook entries~! how exciting! I LOVE YOU GUYS... what. it's like 8:30 in the morning, and i'm ready to blog. I think I blog more than anyone right now cuz I'm a newbie, and plus, I'm at work with NADA to do.

So I'm at work this morning, some guy delivers McDonald's... and I call up this person named "Ramsey" but she didn't pick up the phone, some guy named Mike did. How am I supposed to know that Ramsey is a girl and not a guy? And the guy was asking me if he sounded like her or something. the nerve. I don't like being mocked (yeah, he probably didn't mean any harm, but still, my little heart can't handle it). Then he comes to the front... Sees the guy, and asks him how much the food was... the guy pointed at the receipt, cuz i guess he doesn't speak English well... and this dude Mike had the nerve to mumble "No Speaka Engles?" Dude, first of all, that ain't even spanish! Second, if you can't speak it, don't even try, or it'll make you sound like a racist babboon. It kinda makes you think, doesn't it. People just blurb out lil comments under their breath, trying to help things out a lil, but instead, they're just perceived as naive. Naivety. what can you do?

Hmm.... Deep thought for the day... I really can't think of anything I am passionately urging to blab about... boys... I've been talking to my cousin lately about dating... she's actually dating now, it's her first boyfriend, well, not yet, they're just dating and all the good things that come along with dating. She's nervous yet excited... it's like a new path in her life, perhaps all that mischief for the pre-steady stage. hahaha. I hope she never reads this... sorry cous.... and I can't help but think about myself. I'm always selfish like that, everything has to relate back to me and how I feel and how I'm feeling. Why haven't I dated yet? okay, maybe a few dates here and there, but never really dated someone seriously. The thing is, everytime they get close, I back away. Why is that? Am I afraid of something? Perhaps afraid of commitment? nah... i don't think i am... maybe since i'm sooo inexperienced, i don't even know what to do with a bf when i get one... or like when i'm on a date, i don't know what i'm supposed to do, what i'm supposed to say, what's supposed to happen... isn't there a book about dating edicates? hahha... yeah, i know there's a book... Dating for Dummies... Louis has one. hahaha. It didn't help him... so i'm guessing, it's not going to help me much if i did read it huh? And do i only want to date ONE guy my whole life? or do i wanna go all skanky and date as many as possible? that way i'll secure myself with the best... the salmon of the sea. or whatever fish that's better... or maybe filet mignon of all beefs. hahaha. i'll never know... i just keep praying that God will find me the right one, and that way, i really don't have to work hard for it, and plus, won't experience the heartaches and crap that happens when you break up. yeah, i'll find that Mr.Perfect-from-head-to-toe-that-fulfills-20-out-of-20-on-my-man-list-super-hunk one day... gotta trust the big man huh?

okay, so i told louis to help me add a few things to the page... but i think he's revamping it all~! well, stay tuned for a guestbook!

As if one cannot blog enough for one day... I am blogging again. sigh. This is insanity. All I have to say is, I hate the person who introduced this to us. Jon and Greg. yes, the evils of all evils.

Let's see... I wanna blog about something more interesting and more controversial so I can create a world of chaos if anyone reads this. heh. A college degree. Do we really need it? As of now, I think not. You can get a high paying job... well, for the amount of work it's worth... with just a High School Degree. So why did I go to college? With my Microsoft Office super pro skills, I can get the same receptionist job I am temping at right now. How hard is it to answer the phones and then to transfer them? And the job gets so boring not to mention demeaning. I am a college graduate which means jack to the other analysts there perhaps. You can't sit there and not help but think they think you're an imbesol who is computer illiterate and missin half the brain they have. Shoulda studied harder in college. Heed to the wise: college sucks in an economy that's going belly up.

So this is it. My very own blogspot. What am I doing? I am at work with nothing to do right now... and I am blogging. I said I wouldn't start one, but after reading numerous blogs... I have decided, I need to blog on my own site. There may be no replies, no responses, but I will be a happy blogger, knowing that my thoughts may be read by those who do not know me. Now, my first battle would be to revamp this page. It needs to look better than this right? Perhaps a picture of Princess Serenity herself can help the dull and weary look of this page. Pinky will be proud of this; I am sure.